I guess on the inside of me I was angry because I couldn’t understand what I had done wrong, what I did that made me hurt you or maybe made you hate me so much. Then I remember you went to counseling with me once, I had stolen your pills all of them every single Vicodin you had. you had hurt your back bad and you needed them, I stole them from you and I threw them away. This is so unlike me because I was an active addict at that time so any proper addict would be appalled at my behavior. I threw them away, I didn’t even take them not one single pill, I stole them from you because I wanted you to hurt, I had a particular reason. no particular reason is cognitively known to me at that time. Anyway, I stole them from you because I wanted you to notice me pay attention to ease the pain I had inside. my little girl, wanting your attention. stole something that used to ease your pain. your pain. I didn’t even regret it the moment I did it I felt nothing I planned it out it was a perfect time and I expected you just to move on. now in hindsight, I see my mistake, you will never feel the pain that I feel for you or that I have been subjected to by you I forgive myself for stealing from you because finally, I understand it. I went to that counseling agency last Friday I went to the wrong counseling agency I didn’t know why but now I do. I went there to say goodbye to the last-ditch effort before all this catastrophe the last-ditch effort in hopes that you would understand me. I know that I am one not to be understood you do not love me the way that I want you to. I think, actually, I know that you tolerated me and almost did the best you could.

So Dad. For that I forgive myself for not seeing it before it was too late and that is where this writing ends.

Your chapter has finally found it’s end.

For now at least.

Because Gary, now.

In this chapter,

The Princess Saves herself.

Turn the Page…